There is nothing I can say that improves on the title of this article. It’s a point worth remembering, though, that learning how to manage our feelings and responses to others continues far beyond our school days.
One of the most difficult challenges I’ve faced is managing feelings of frustration with myself or others when things aren’t going the way I wanted or imagined. Thankfully, it’s not as frequent now, but in those days when I was working in the IT department, there were times when it felt like one more call would send me over the edge. Part of the problem was that I wasn’t doing what I really wanted to do, and doing something you don’t like can be exhausting. Another part was that the people I worked with? They didn’t know how to manage their frustrations, either, so they vented them on the IT tech, or the secretary, or the plant guy, or whoever else was around that couldn’t stand up for themselves.
Even if you aren’t one of those people (us people?), you probably know well someone who doesn’t do a great job holding it together. The person who doesn’t get that their jokes are actually hurtful? Yep. The one who doesn’t want to play when they don’t get to go first? Uh-huh. The person who, instead of coming out and telling you they’d like it “this way” does some back-handed, passive-aggressive criticizing when you’ve done your best? Yeah. Not just kids. These are all examples of times when better self-knowledge, more honesty, and clearer communication could have completely changed the situation.
Helping children learn to identify their feelings and make responsible choices is one of the greatest supports we can give. This article is a great starting place.
Hope you enjoy the read!